I sit here thinking, pondering over what has just happened. My mind is racing yet standing still. I am exhausted from the tears and the physical pain. I jut want to sleep the sadness away until it is a mere distant memory.
I found out on Thursday that I was pregnant (Brad and I weren't trying). I immediately quit smoking, started researching all about my meds and there contraindications with pregancy (and decreased them accordingly), started researching everything about how to be the healthiest expectant mom out there, booked anapointment with my gp, and finally, by today, I was excited (and past the bitchiness from quitting smoking).
However, after a lot of cramping and spotting, I went to emergency while I was working and wouldn't you know it, found out that I miscarried.
Just as soon as I had accepted it and had started t0 get excited about it, I found out that it was a failed attempt...a spontaneous abortion as they call it in the medical field.
That is all for now. I'm going to go to sleep now and hopefully wake up tomorrow morning hardly remembering any of this...oh dare to dream...
5 comments:
Wow! I'm sorry! How quickly things can happen. I hope this won't get you down too much and that you will soon recover from this double shock. Will be praying for you tonight.
Thanks Marja,
Yeah, I still feel awful. Very sad. I hope that by the weeks end I will feel a bit better. I cried all day yesterday, today I want to cry but can't seem to do it, maybe tomorrow I won't even feel like crying. Who knows. I feel so emotionally fragile...what do I do with myself?
At any rate, thank you for your prayers.
Love Shebee
What should you do with yourself? Just rest and let God love you and take care of you.
Love, marja
Im sorry. Very sorry!
I'm SO SORRY! What a rollercoaster of emotions, and a sad, sad thing to happen. I think it's very normal to cry - you've suffered a HUGE loss. I hope your sadness doesn't last long and you feel better soon...
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